Love hurts

One afternoon I was waiting in a bus stop. I sat beside a 19-year old school boy and a man probably in his 70’s.

The boy looked distracted as I could see the battlefield in his eyes.

“Love hurts,” he blurted out.

Before I could say anything, the old man smiled and said,

“No. Never with the right person, young man. I was with this woman for 35 years and it never hurt. There was not even a single heartache during the whole time I was with her. The world hurts, time hurts, destiny almost killed— but with her it was bliss. She was the only happiness that never faded. It could get messy sometimes but there was this exhilaration in knowing that I got her. Love hurts if you’re with the wrong person. I had been in a multiple pointless relationships before her, and trust me, all I ever felt was frustration, anxiety and fear— fear that they might leave me, fear that I may never be enough, fear that one morning I’d wake up and they were gone. I wasn’t patient enough to wait- I poured myself to the wrong people that when the right one came, I was not at my best- I was not whole anymore. I scattered pieces of me instead of giving her all of what I was.  But it never was a problem with her. See young man, she made me the happiest man for 35 years. She made me whole again without me even noticing. She was the right one. But she was taken away from me. She died from her sickness. Still she was able to make me happy up to her dying moment— up until now. Everytime I see her in my mind, all I feel is happiness. It’s a privilege to be that last man she had ever loved. So if you ever find that person in this sweeping universe, never ever commit your greatest regret of letting her go.”

He was smiling the whole time, like he was still in love, like as if the greatest love of his life was at home waiting for him. Like she was still alive.

I believed his smile. I trusted the forever in his eyes. And I realized that the world could be better after all.

—Shi Collantes


(c)